Melbourne’s Greatest Commie and Nazi Sideshow Spectacle.

“Remember, upon the conduct of each depends the fate of all.”

Alexander the Great

On Saturday 13th May, The Greatest Showman cast and crew met Melbourne’s Romper Stompers in a face-off calling for changes to Australia’s immigration policies. While one side was advocating for open borders, and pro-LGBTQIA+ rights, and pro-immigrant rights, the other wants “living spaces for white people”, and the end of Israel and immigration. Ironically both extremes of left and right, stood out front of Melbourne’s iconic and beautiful Princess theatre to provide the people with a cheap sideshow act.

A band of 20 Nazis clad in black, faced off against some 300 Commies. Both groups well-protected by Victoria police, chanted a medley of insults back and forth at each other. The Commies called out wannabe Hitlers, whilst wannabe Hitlers called out the elusive “Jewish power”. It almost felt like a scene out of West Side Story, only without good music and dancing. It was quite the show with one spectator even turning up with a seat and bowl of pop corn. I’m sure it will provide a lifetime of memes for the avid trolls.

Standing there long enough, listening to the chanting, it’s understandable how the entertainment and music industry is so powerful. I found myself almost involuntarily tapping my feet to the beat of their chants. It was like a B-grade concert of talentless performers who, just through the power of repetition, could potentially turn an unwitting audience into either mini Commies or Nazis. One would need great discernment not to get drawn in. Although, no one really likes Nazis, and most people think advocating for refugees is a “nice” thing, so I wouldn’t place bets on the Nazis converting many. However, they still managed to muster up a small, willing group to publicly spout their disgusting views, albeit all while hidden behind masks.

It has to be said, Hitler would be rolling in his grave at the sight of today’s Nazis. It was such a pitiful display of masked, unusually short, skinny and rather effeminate-looking pseudo men who claim to be of superior, pure white Aryan stock. Ironically, they resembled nothing of the sort, it was difficult to take them seriously. Worse still, in order to put an end to the protest, Victoria Police rolled in the divvy van to arrest and haul out the Nazis if they didn’t comply with “move on” orders as directed by Senior Police Officers. The Nazis obediently complied and were led away by their Ring Master Tom Sewell and marched off stage, safely escorted out by Vic Police. All the while sigheiling to an angry mob of Commies shaking their fists and screaming loudly.

There wasn’t a lot of violence, only a few scuffles from what I could tell. No one really got hurt, except Avi Yemini who was physically attacked, yet again. Nazis and Commies seem to go crazy whenever he makes an appearance. He almost has a Hitlerian effect on the people. Thankfully, most attacks were more of the verbal kind. One Nazi even called me Vegemight, now I can say both Commies and Nazis have called me Vegemight, which only proves my point that they are two sides of the same coin. I often wonder why they just don’t let the freak shows battle it out without police supervision and let the evolutionary process run its course. It would be interesting to see how many still turn up knowing there will be no police protection.